Journal

Here is where I will post some person items I am going through in order to further my personal growth.

3/3/11

It's been awhile since I've journaled here.  It's time to reflect on life.  Life is far to precious to give up on it because of a bad relationship.  Too many teens and even older adults give up on life because of a loss of an loved one.  No we aren't talking about them dying but about a love walking out of your life.  Lossing a love is hard and takes some getting over when you believe you are in love and plan to be with for the rest of your life.

Recently, one of my grandchildren had her love leave her and she felt her life must end as she could not imagine living without him.  As we reflect on this  situation we must realize our life has meaning and purspose and God has a plan for us we can't give up on life just because the one we love walks out on us.

We prayed and interceeded for my granddaughter and God spared her life.  We thank God for his grace and mercy and to give her another chance at making a go at life.  I pray she makes the choice to start her life over in a move to another town where other family members can help her get her life back on track.

Life is too short give up on it too early. God has a divine plan and purpose for us all, we just must seek his direction and wisdom for making wise life choices.

2/9/11

Don't be like the horse which has no understanding but must be controlled by the bit and bridle. Ps. 32:9

A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions. Pr. 18:2

I have this problem that is sharing my opinion about everything good bad or indifferent  I share it .  I am learning that everything I say is not important and everyone doesn't want my opinion.  Sharing with my prayer partner I have learned that "unasked for advice is criticism."  Wow, I never looked at it like this but that I was trying to be helpful but its not always helpful. 

In pondering this it remember the scripture which talks about bridling the tongue.  I saw this image in my mind.  A horse with a bridle on.  Makes me even more remember to hold my tongue and not give advice unless asked and even then at times it still is not necessary.  We need to ask God if we should even comment or reply.  Maybe we need to tell the person questioning to seek God's answer instead of mans.

So here below is my prayer:

I will watch my ways and keep my tongue from sin and keep a bridle in my mouth. Ps. 39:1



1/30/11
Today in the message at church was "I will QUIT walking in FEAR!
I learn my greatest fear was loosing my children.  And the one I feared the most as oldest daughter because she has diabetes.  I worry about her blood sugars getting to low and not waking up or having a car accident because of low blood sugars.  I worry that her children would be alone with out their mother and they so need her. 

But in realizing this I realize that I have not put her in God's hands and I'm not trusting him with her life. I need to no longer walk in fear but to trust God to take care of her.  I also realized that isn't a new fear but an older I've had since my daughter became a diabetic.  A very familiar spirit I need remove from my life.


1/24/01
Today is the end of the 21 day fast.  Or should I say the first day of  feasting after the fast.  This has truly been an hard thing to do.  Some many foods to go without and limited things to eat and create meals with.  But its been a good time of learning submission to the Father and making our bodies subject to what our will says and not allowing our bodies to control us.  Most of our church went on this fast and so did many other churches.  Many people fasted for wisdom, direction, finances, government/economy issues, more intimacy with God, etc.

I fasted for more wisdom for my life, whether it be physical or spiritual I wanted more wisdom and more of God.  For with this nothing shall be impossible.  Even with doing this we never have it all.  I thought I'd feel more spiritual but I don't.  I feel there is so much more to God than we can even imagine that I just need to stay focused and be readily available to be used by him.  I pray that my eyes are open more clearly and that I can see the direction God has for me.  I do know this is a year of new beginnings and new ministries.  I  have had many dreams about this so I know its on the horizon.  The key here is for me to be patient with God and not rush things.  I must not allow the cart to get before the horse.  Everything has a time a place and a procedure to follow, I must be patient with God for he knows whats best in all things.

1/20/01
So you shall speak to all who are gifted artisans, whom I have filled with the spirit of wisdom!
 Ex. 28:3

This was in my scripture reading today.  I had no idea it was in the bible.  God called some people gifted artisans/craftsmen and that some were filled with the spirit of wisdom.  I so want to be this kind of person. One whom God calls gifted in my craft and one who is filled with wisdom.

This was in reference to God asking for all those gifted in sewing to make the priestly garments for the temple workers.  What a awesome job it was to be called to make special garments for the priests to wear.  I pray and hope that my garments will be blessed and used by those whom God calls forth to use as needed.  May I be a servant of the most high God and be a blessing to others.


1/12/11
Sometimes decisions in life are really hard, but they only thing you can do is trust God and ask for wisdom. I pray for His guidance and direction.  Life is to short to be frustrated and to not be happy.  Only God knows I want the best for the others around me.  I seek his peace and guidance. 

Thank you Lord for always being ever present and ready to help.

1/5/11
Come to me all ye who are weak and heavy laden, burden, for I will give you rest.  I will ease and relieve and refresh your soul.  Mat. 11:28-30

I'm so thankful that God is there to help me through my daily struggles in life.  That I am nothing without him but with him I can do all things.


1/4/11
Watching Glen Beck today he had some good points for the new year that point to more personal growth for the individual and would and could effect America as a whole.

4 E's
1. Enlightenment
2. Education
3. Empowerment
4. Entrepreneurship

In Enlightenment; seek God, for he is the author and finisher of all things.  Without him we are nothing.

Education:  We need to be wise as a serpent but gentle as a dove. We need to seek knowledge and not be blindsided by the governmental rulings that keep the people weak and them in power.

Empowerment:  we need to not sit back and let things just happen we need to take charge of our lives and be active in all things.  How are we making a difference in this world?  Are we just sitting back and letting it happen or are we going to do something about it.  Too many times we as individuals and even as Americans sit back and do nothing and then wonder why all the problems are happening to us.  What are we going to do about it?  More specifically what am I going to do about it?  I need to take charge of my life.

Entrepreneurship:  America is founded on good hard working business men and women.  We need to know what God's plan is for our life.  God wants us to be prosperous and not let the government rule our businesses and take over.We need to step up to the plate and take our place in this world.  Who are we meant to become?

Beck also has a book that covers these 7 wonders that we need to consider:

Courage
Faith
Truth
Compassion
Friendship
Family
Common Sense

Looking at these I need to seek and find the meaning for these 7 wonders truly they have a definite place in our lives.  I just need to get a hold of how.


1/3/11
For the new year I want to be more committed in my devotions.  I want to follow these steps more avidly.

1) Daily - seek God
2) Weekly - worship
3) Monthly - tithe
4) Yearly - fast.

All these things are a good beginning but not just to do as little as mentioned in our lesson this week from Lifechurch.tv.  Personally, I need to worship daily and fast more than once a year.  But these are the basic goals to start the year off right.  I am setting  these for myself at the start of this new year.  I just need to remember my focus and not get too rapped up in this things of this world.